Doing Nothing

Back before I had kids, I did everything that I wanted.  Okay, so there were some places I wanted to travel to that I never did, and maybe some big projects that I couldn't find time for, but pretty much, I did everything.  I slept as much as I needed to.  I stayed at work as late as I wanted.  I went to the gym whenever I wanted to, and stayed there as long as I felt like.  I made dinner whenever I got to it (or not), and sat enjoying my meal for as long as I cared to.  My house was SO clean!  I showered daily, washing my hair AND shaving each time.  I stayed up late drinking, talking and playing games with friends.  I talked to my husband as much as I wanted, without interruption.  I had hobbies!  I watched television!  I went shopping!  Okay, so maybe life wasn't quite as perfect and carefree as I'm remembering it, but it was pretty darn close.

Of course I knew that once I had children I'd have to make some sacrifices.  Duh.  I knew I wouldn't get to do everything I wanted all the time.  And I was okay with that.  I was prepared to make some sacrifices.  After we had kids, I pushed aside my scrapbooking materials.  I drank extra coffee to make up for the lack of sleep.  I went to the gym less frequently.  Sacrifices.  I got it.  I was totally cool with that.

Then, I had four kids.  Not only can I no longer do everything, but now I don't have time to do anything.  At all.   I'm not kidding.  The entirety of my day is spent meeting the needs of others. Brushing teeth, feeding, wiping, changing, dressing, shuttling, reading, playing, more feeding, more wiping, and on and on and on.  And some days, I'm barely able to do those things.

There is simply no time for even the basics, let alone anything remotely luxurious.  Jeff and I have gone on exactly one date since Rose was born.  And she came with us! Our house is actually frightening in its untidiness.  I get queasy at the thought of even entering certain rooms.  Every day I have to make choices that no one should be forced to make.  Eat or shower?  Get dressed or brush my teeth? Do laundry or dishes? Pick up toys in this room or toys in that room?  Sleep or have an uninterrupted conversation with my husband?

In fact, I do not have time to write this blog post right now.  Sam and Amelia are upstairs playing - hair and teeth unbrushed, jammies still on.  Amelia has to be at school in half an hour and they haven't eaten lunch yet.  Sam's not wearing a diaper.  He's probably pooping on the floor.  But I digress...

What I mean to say, is that even the smallest tasks are just SO HARD.  First, there's the things we have to do to the kids.  I'm talking about things like dressing, bathing, putting on footwear, applying sunscreen, and the most hated of all - brushing teeth.  They like to keep us on our toes by putting up varying levels of resistance from day to day.  We never know who is going to be the cooperative one at any given moment.  It's usually Rose, though, since she can't run away yet.  They even like to put up a fight about things involving their basic needs, like sleeping, eating, and using the bathroom. Seriously?!? Stop dancing and just pee already!

Sometimes I just think to myself, "Fine! Go off and play in your underwear with your messy face and your tangly hair.  I'm going to do something that doesn't involve the care of children.  I'm going to accomplish something!"  This morning, for example, I was determined to tighten Sam's door knob that had been loose for weeks.  I went to the garage and came back with a screw driver.  After exactly one twist Sam was by my side wanting to "help." Then Amelia wanted a turn.  Because I'm a sucker for "helpers," plus I know one day I'll actually want their help, I let them.   Then, they wanted to use the screw driver to "fix" other things around the house. Then, Rose woke up and wanted to be changed and fed.  And now I'm not really sure where the screw driver is.  And the doorknob is still loose.

Two Month Olds, Part IV

Rose 10.75 lbs, 22.75"

Samuel 13.5 lbs, 23.5"

Marley 7.75 lbs, 21.5"

Amelia 11.5 lbs, 24"

One Month, Part IV

Rose 10lbs

Amelia 9lbs 8oz

Marley 5lbs 15oz

Samuel 11lbs 12oz

Breastfeeding

With a newborn in the house, the kids get to see me breastfeeding a lot. This results in some pretty sweet pretend play. 

Amelia has been breastfeeding her dollies. Here was her instruction on what to do: "Lift up your shirt. Put the baby's mouth on your booby. Now say, 'Ouch!'"

Sam attempted to breastfeed his stuffed bear. He lifted up his shirt, but wasn't sure what to do next. After lots of searching, he settled on nursing the bear from his belly button.

Thankfully, Rose's latch has gotten much better over the last week. Pair that with the breaks I get from Jeff giving her a bottle, and I'm saying 'Ouch!' a lot less these days!

This is hard

We survived our first two weeks as a family of six!  I think Jim Gaffigan, now a father of FIVE, best described what having four kids was like.  "Imagine you're drowning," he explains, "and then someone hands you a baby."

Yep.  That's pretty much what it's like.  It is a rare moment that I'm not busy meeting someone's immediate needs.  The day is a blur of dressing, wiping, feeding, changing, brushing teeth, more feeding, more wiping, and so on, and so on.  And this is with Jeff still home on paternity leave!  The thought of having to do this alone all day makes me break into a cold sweat.

This time around, we only spent just over 24 hours in the hospital.  (Special thanks to our friends, Amanda, Nancy, and Mike, who all stepped in to watch the big kids while we were at the hospital!) And we hit the ground running as soon as we got back.  In fact, I really felt that I overdid it on our first day home, and was in a lot more pain than I should have been that first week.

It's been two weeks, and I'm feeling pretty good, physically.  Eventually, I'll post Rose's birth story, but basically, it was fast.  I felt the first contraction around 2 o'clock that afternoon.  By 3 o'clock we were eating ice cream outside of Husky Deli.  We arrived at the hospital at 5 o'clock, and were admitted to the birthing room around six.  Rose was born at 7:10 pm.  Phew!

Since all my other kids had some degree of tongue tie, it was one of the first things I looked for with Rose.  I could see immediately that her frenulum was tight and attached almost all the way to the tip of her tongue.  Our family doctor said she could perform the frenotomy right in the office as soon as we wanted.  I brought Rose in on that Monday morning to have it done at less than 2 days old.  I'm SO glad I didn't wait.  We didn't have Sam's done until he was a week old, and by then nursing had become so painful that I was in tears every time I had to feed him.  

Feeding Rose is still painful, but it's getting better as she learns how to extend and use her tongue properly and not rely on her lips and gums (ouch!) to nurse.  We actually have a bunch of tongue training exercises that we're supposed to do before each feeding.  She's doing great, though, and has already surpassed her birth weight: She was 8.5lbs at her 11 day doctor's appointment.  She's doing so well that Jeff gave her her first bottle of pumped breast milk yesterday, which she took like a champ.

The other kids are adjusting, too.  Marley adores Rose, and is excited to hold her each morning.  In fact, he and Amelia usually fight over who gets to hold her first. Amelia is probably the most interested in taking care of Rose.  She always wants to hold her, change her diaper, and dress her.  And then there's Sam.  He's really not very interested in Rose, but he does miss having Amelia to play with all morning.

Rose Eleanor Franklin

Born on February 28, 2015 at 7:10 pm

8 lbs 6.5 oz

19" long

We are all at home now, and getting used to life as a family of six! A few people have asked what we need.  A friend set up a meal train calendar for us. We've had our first two dinners at home delivered, and it's been wonderful! Here's the link, if you'd like to sign up: Food Tidings.

Stay tuned for more adventures starring Rose!

A thousand words

As always, Bella Baby Photography did a phenomenal job with the newborn photos. Our photographer was able to capture the first moments of the big kids meeting their new sister.

To view the photos go to Bella Baby Photography and enter the password Lyou0301franklin.

Oh, and have a tissue ready. You've been warned!